Bob the Beautiful Cockroach?

Really, can a cockroach be beautiful?

Genesis 1:31, “God saw all that he had made, and it was very good. And there was evening, and there was morning—the sixth day.”

[Good- in Greek, Tobe: 1. Good, pleasant, agreeable

1. Pleasant, agreeable (to the senses)


2. Pleasant (to the higher nature)

Beauty- Merriam-Webster Online: the quality or aggregate of qualities in a person or thing that gives pleasure to the senses or pleasurably exalts the mind or spirit : loveliness]

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So, Can a cockroach be beautiful?

Everything God makes is beautiful.

God made a cockroach.

Therefore, yes, a cockroach is beautiful.

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Personally though, I am repulsed by cockroaches. Nonetheless, becoming more Christ-like, means seeing creation like he sees it: beautiful. So, I have embarked on a quest to see cockroaches as beautiful.

I sketched a roach to study their aesthetic beauty, and frankly, I was surprised to find, that they are quite marvelous (although, I’m still having trouble seeing them as beautiful). The way their wings are ridged, and fold into each other, making complicated patterns on their backs is remarkable.

In the meantime, while I researched them, I found that roaches are among the most vital decomposers. They eat decomposing material, and return the nutrients to the soil.

So, for now, while I’m still working on seeing them as aesthetically beautiful, I concur with my friend who said, “It’s [a roach] like the guy who works in the sewer. He’s dirty and maybe a little creepy, but he cleans everything up.”

Cockroaches are beautiful.

A Mirror is Harder to Hold

Honestly, this is really a continuation of my last post. The more I think about it the more I think that to pursue the appearance of anything is the opposite of pursuing the actual thing. To attain, you first must admit that you do not have.

To increase:

*Knowledge you must first admit ignorance.

*Truthfulness you must first admit lies.

*Order you must first admit chaos.

*Strength you must first admit weakness.

*Love you must first admit hate or apathy.

*Righteousness you must first admit filth. imperfection. sin.

Does this book make me look smart?

What is the antithesis of the pursuit of knowledge?

This summer, I’ve finally had time to read--not just school books, but books that I want to read. Over the last week or two I’ve finished Uncle Tom’s Cabin and The Scarlet Letter, and now I’m working on Moby Dick.

As much as I am enjoying them, sometimes, I find myself excited that the book I’m reading is coming to a close so that I can pick the next book. While I’m picking books, I’m not necessarily looking for the most intellectually stimulating book; instead, I’m looking for the book that seems to be one that well-read people read.

This summer I’m taking an SAT prep course. I already took prep courses last summer and last school year. I learn in these courses to some degree, but mostly they just help me bring up my test scores.

Which leads me to wonder…does the pursuit of knowledge have two opposites? The pursuit of ignorance is its obvious antithesis, but maybe the pursuit of knowledge has a second, more insidious converse:  the pursuit of the appearance of knowledge.

In trying to appear smart, I fail to ask questions when I don’t understand, because it might look stupid, and I rush from one thought and book to next trying to compile an intellectual resume of sorts without always trying to understand what I’m reading and thinking. In trying to appear like I’m pursuing knowledge, sometimes, I don’t actually pursue knowledge.

So. My goals:  (1) While I’m reading a book or thinking a thought, really read and think-- rather than just pushing through to finish my book or thought, chewing on it. Questioning it. Discussing it. (2) In SAT prep, find real, applicable ways to use the knowledge more the trying to seem smart for the purpose of college admissions.

So, I had an Idea...

I picked up a copy of "Roll of Thunder, Hear my Cry" from Half Price Books (I have to confess though, I didn't finish it...). I noticed that, a few pages into the book, it's last owner had made a flip book out of the bottom right hand corner depicting a stick figure shooting a cannon. It amused me.

Honestly though, my favorite part about reading used books is finding other people's notes and doodles in the margins. It adds character, and their scribbled thoughts springboard new thoughts of my own as I read.

So, I had a idea.

I think it would be really cool to start a book-lending group, in which people must write in the books they borrow.

Is anyone interested?

I think. Now what?

I remember sitting in the car at around age two or three and hearing my older brother, Landon, tell Mom, “I have a question: …” I promptly ask, “What’s a question?” “What you just ask,” someone replied. I don’t remember the rest of the explanation; it didn’t make much sense to me, but wanting to be as intelligent as Landon, I said, “I have a question.” I followed this assertion with another statement, which I was informed was not a question.

Even before we know what questions are, we begin to ask them. Sometimes I wonder, though. What is the point of thinking? I don’t mean “simple” thinking such as basic cognitive function, thinking about activities and people, or planning the day’s events. I mean deep thinking. Asking about the nature of existence, knowledge, and morality, and reason. The yawning chasm of an utter lack of understanding sometimes seems more frightening than inspiring.

Today, I read Philippians 4:8:

“Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.”

The verse puzzles me to some extent. Words like “lovely” or “of good repute” have so many different meanings that it seems hard to apply. I went through the verse with a Strong’s Concordance, looking at the Greek words and cross referencing them, which did clear up a lot of the ambiguity. The most surprising discovery, for me though, came when I looked up, “dwell.”

Logizomai: “To consider, take into account, weigh, meditate on…This word deals with reality. If I “logizomai” or reckon that my bank book has $25 in it, it has $25 in it. Otherwise I am deceiving myself. This word refers to facts not suppositions.”

We aren’t instructed to “dwell” esoterically on ideas that we cannot relate back to the real world. Instead, the answer to, “why think?” comes in verse 9,

“The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.”

We think so that we will act as God wants us to act. We think to seek the truth about the nature of existence, knowledge, and morality, and reason, not so that we can give ourselves philosophical high-fives, but so that we can determine a real course of action.

What is a question? An opportunity to pursue truth and act on it.

I Like Bananas.

You may have already heard about my reconciliation with bananas; I’ve told lots of people just because it’s so exciting to me. In case you haven’t heard though, let me explain.

I’ve never liked bananas. When I was little, I tried very hard to like them. They’re a uniquely wonderful fruit—happily yellow and satisfyingly peel-covered. So intense was my dislike that up until last fall, I had only peeled a banana once to my memory.

At the Frisco debate tournament last November, Kathryn and I were talking about bananas and my sad lack of banana peeling experience. From that point on, she made my day by allowing me to peel all of her bananas. Kathryn is a very wonderful person.

In Singapore, one day. I tried a banana. I liked the banana. Ecstatic doesn’t quite cover this new discovery. Joyful, maybe? Peeling [and eating] bananas is now one of my new favorite hobbies.

I’ve changed a lot since I was little, and in some cases I didn’t even know I’ve changed. Eating was once a dangerous occupation fraught with untold dangers. After all, I detested:

• Cinnamon


• Mangos


• Bananas


• Potatoes


• Lettuce


• Fish (other than Salmon)


• Mayonnaise


• Spinach


• Jelly


• Peanut butter


• Wheat bread


• Beans


• Tomatoes


• Butter


• Cheese


• Corn


• Bananas


• Milk


• The list of foods I hated but now like (or am learning to like) goes on….

Sometimes I get very sick and tired of being myself. Certain weaknesses and personality traits make me want to just run until somehow or other, I leave myself behind. As much as I want to escape myself at times, losing my identity is my single greatest fear. And yet, I’m never really the same person for very long, my interests, passions, questions, and tastes in foods are constantly morphing. I guess what I’m trying to say is that because I change so often, as much as I’d like to, I can’t define myself. God doesn’t change, and so He’s the only one who can actually give me an identity. I thank God that I am His and He knows me  regardless of whether or not I like bananas.

Meekness is...

So... I said I would post about Singapore, but my thoughts bunny trailed in a different direction, so Singapore will have to come later.

Too often people group spinelessness, cowardice, and meekness as synonyms. And yet, meekness or gentleness (depending on the translation) is one of the fruits of the spirit, and Jesus said the meek/gentle would inherit the earth. In our culture meekness seems to be anything but noble. Granted part of the difficulty comes from translating the original Greek to English. The word for meekness in Greek is Prautes.

Arostotle described Prautes as:

"The ability to bear reproaches and slights with moderation, and not to embark on revenge quickly, and not to be easily provoked to anger, but to be free from bitterness and contentiousness, having tranquility and stability in the spirit."

Other defenitions include "strength tempered by gentleness" or "strength under control"

Cowardice and meekness are antonyms.

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Meekness is coloring wildly--inside the lines.

Meekness is thinking outside the box, but relating those thoughts to others so as to broaden their horizens

Meekness is unabashedly valuing truth without insisting others know you are right.

Meekness is saying yes.

Meekness is saying no.

Meekness is a leader following.

Meekness is understanding that despite your best efforts at philosophy, logic, and reason, some things, you will only understand intuitively.

Meekness is listening.

Meekness is a child sitting still.

Meekness is a thought written down.



Meekness is courage bowing to wisdom.

Meekness is pragmatism bowing to faith.

Meekness is the Lord of the Universe coming to earth as a baby.

The true measure of a tool lies, not in its inherent effectiveness or efficiency, but in its ability to be used.

So now I’m blogging? / Awakening

I'm still not entirely sure what I think about this whole blogging thing. I've contemplated blogging for a while, but always decided I don't have enough time. Time disappears constantly and business only escalates.

With that said, I think better when I'm typing anyway. Somehow, my thoughts just reorder themselves and become coherent when I can see them in front of me... I guess I'm just better at thinking with a keyboard than inside my own head. I probably won't post as often as I should, but then, if people really want to know what's going on in my life, they should just ask me.

For the moment, I'm setting myself the goal of blogging about the ICC Masters Conference and Singapore... we'll see what happens with that. I'll kick off this mini-series with a poem I wrote on the Institute for Culture Communiticators Theme for 2010:

Awakening:

Who is she?
This silent girl
Who wanders
Through the halls of another's mind

Looking for herself
But finding
No one

Coming to a room of mirrors
Looking
She'd see both
Herself and another

Afraid of finding
Cataract filmed eyes
She prefers
Her own imagination

Blinded by the night
She musters
Courage for the morning